Lucian: Pondering the Fate of the Chicken
This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my Disclosure and Privacy Policy.
Yesterday Lucian and I went to the grocery store together and I picked up a yummy rotisserie chicken since the whole family loves them. On the way home this was our conversation:
Me: Lucian, we have to get home so we can eat our chicken. Daddy and Warren are waiting for us.
Lucian: Mommy, does it have bones? Do I get to touch the bones?
Me: Yes, the chicken has bones and you can touch them.
Lucian: What sound does a chicken make?
Me: They cluck. It kind of sounds like this: brrk, broock, broock, brk-ooock
Lucian: Does our chicken do that?
Me: Well, honey, I’m sure it did before but it won’t anymore.
Lucian: Why doesn’t it do that anymore?
Me: Honey, our chicken isn’t alive anymore.
Lucian: Why is our chicken not alive?
Me (grasping): Because it dies before we cook it and this chicken is already cooked.
Lucian: Why did it die?
Me (gulp): Because someone killed it so that we could eat the chicken for food. Chicken is very good for us and will help you grow.
Lucian (pondering this): Oh.
Ugh. I really love having open conversations with Lucian and I don’t ever want to lie to him. But I’ll admit I was put on the spot with his questioning and wondering the proper way to handle it. Lucian is very smart and always curious and I knew that if I bypassed the question he would just ask it in a different way later. I don’t ever want to discourage him from being inquisitive.
Has your child every asked you something you weren’t exactly sure how to answer?
you were right to be honest. i don’t think it’s fair for parents to lie to their kids. it might make the kids resentful later and untrusting. sometimes the truth hurts but you said it simply and directly.
now, he is a smart kid and if he can’t bring himself to eat the chicken because he knows it died, it’s ok. he will find other things to eat.
We’ve actually had almost this exact conversation, too, LOL! I was thinking that my more sensitive son would stop eating meat after the talk and he really thought about it for awhile but in the end he decided that chicken and hamburgers were too yummy to live without… though I can see him as a vegetarian when he is older and can buy his own alternatives but I suppose time will tell. :o)
7 years ago when I went through a divorce I asked my counselor how to handle hard questions from my kids and she encouraged me to be truthful but not to explain things over their head – keep it simple & age appropriate. Lying will turn around to bite you in the butt in the end. IMHO you handled it very well!
My daughter is seven and has recently been wanting a little sister REAL bad. So I am sure you can guess the questions that have been coming up…lol…yep..”how exactly will you get the baby in your tummy mommy?” I just said Daddy and I loved each other sooo much one day…and a very special thing happened, you! Then I changed the subjrct real quick..lol Well, I think most things should be answered on an age-need to know-basis. I do think having to be honest about the chicken would have been tough for me too. We just want our kids to hurt/confused in any way. Its just natural to protect them.
LOL We just had a similar themed conversation today. My 4yo Sam was standing beside me when I was looking in the freezer. He looks in and gasps and grabs handle to our frozen turkey and says “Whats wrong with our chicken?” “Nothing honey, that’s a turkey.” I hoped that would end it, haha. “What wrong with the turkey?” I had to explain that it was packaged that way for us until we cook it. He said he wants to pet our turkey alive. Sorry bud!
LOL that’s funny poor little chicken!